The Spoon

Ok. The event was rigged. How do I know this, you say? Well, for one there was no valet parking. Yes, the event was at the infamous Indiana Roof Ballroom at the IRT but I didn’t know I would need to park on the roof of the parking garage. Another indicator—our table, which we sponsored, was way off in the corner, not by ourselves, but not in the mix of all the other big sponsors either. Maybe we need to be at least a Silver Sponsor instead of just a table sponsor to get the better seats. Seriously though, I am just kidding about it being rigged. It is a fine event and great recognition for Indiana and its best companies. I am very glad that we were able to be a part of it.

We did have a lot of fun poking fun at some of the other companies and their claims as to why they too area a great place to work along with my smart a** comments. I was also impressed though by some of the things that other companies do to foster a great place to work. Here are just a few of those high-lights silly or not-so-silly perks.

• Gumball machine in the break room with free gum in it! (Where do I sign up?)


• $50 towards continuing education (annually)


• Company meetings with the CEO (Yawn. I thought everybody did that)


• Chili cook-offs (Hey, we do that—Thanks to Garth!)


• Half day off to go holiday shopping (Figures--this was from a downtown law firm. Simon Malls is probably their biggest account)


• Bring your pet to work (And bring a lint roller)


• Tickets to the State Fair (More content for State Fair Bingo maybe)


• A nap room (I can hear the accountants from here,” Does anyone do any work around here?)


• A bank says that they have their employees call the CEO by his first name. (Wow!!)


• Knitting & Crocheting Club (Sounds like a carpal tunnel trap)


• Fitness Rooms and showers (We do that, too!)


• A suggestion box (Did any of you see the episode of the office when Michael Scott decides to break out the suggestion box? http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-7139351528268982023&pr=goog-sl


• A lidded travel mug for all employees so they don’t spill.


• Indoor basketball court for b-ball and dodge ball (Now that’s cool!)


• A free lunch (who said there was no such thing?)


• Interest free employee loans (And this company is not even a bank! How do they do that?)

Now, having mentioned these perks, I need to confess that I must have failed to recognize on our initial application which section would be used in the program. The section that was included for us and which was read by Gerry Dick the emcee, failed to truly describe our perks and cool company culture. Instead it went into great detail about our employee bonus plan. Don’t get me wrong, money speaks louder than words (most of the time) and it is certainly nice to see that all important slide that Dean likes to show us every quarter. You know the one—the “only one that we care about, right?”

So, not to be upstaged by free bubble gum in the break room, I thought I would also list some of our cool benefits, perks, and why I think we are the Best Company to Work for in Indiana, even if the judges think we are 31st.

• Free donuts on Fridays (beat feet to the break room as they don’t last long)


• 30 cent pop (It’s cold, too!)


• Yellow break room to un-dilate the pupils


• Flexible work schedules (where the business supports it. Thanks sales, customer service and tech support folks!)


• Tuition reimbursement (Just don’t take basket weaving 101 or an equivalent course)


• Excellent benefits with comparatively low costs of insurance premiums.


• Health Reimbursement Accounts (HRAs)


• Flexible Spending Account


• Matching 401K


• Stock Options (yeah!)


• Carb Day!


• Trick or Treat in the office with your kids


• Chili cook-off


• Casual dress code (You can wear shorts in the winter time…Just ask Brian Christman)


• Bike to work (And people will only laugh behind your back when they see you in your cycling clown suit)


• Innovative technology & innovative, bright minds


• We used to have a book shelf in the rest room. I think I am going to bring that back.


• Data protection software is cool!


• Entrepreneurial work culture


• ClusterFunk Rocks! (What other company has a company band?...Especially one where the CEO is the bass player)


• Growth company!

It is important to also remember as we recap the 31st place award that we did place ahead of several other software companies in Indianapolis (Aprimo, ExactTarget, T2Systems, and Fusion Alliance). Also, the data that we received from the employee survey (remember it is anonymous) is excellent information showing several very encouraging numbers in regards to how we value employees. We have also learned and confirmed understanding of the areas where we can improve. All in all, we had a great time, a lot of laughs, and some good food. We even passed around the extra deserts from empty seats at our table because of a couple of last minute cancellations. I know, it’s tough getting a date/baby sitter on a weeknight.

I have included the picture from the award. Not pictured are the two Double-Take software engineers at our table who were too shy to go up on stage. They will remain nameless. Next year.

Sincerely yours,

Mr. Anderson